Finding Peace Amongst Chaos

Sometimes life throws us into chaotic and overwhelming situations—whether it’s due to personal challenges, external pressures, or the unpredictable nature of the world around us. As someone who has experienced the turbulence of such times, I know how difficult it can be to find a sense of calm. Through my journey I’ve come to find that taking it easy, relaxing, and finding peace are not just fleeting moments—they are achievable, even in the most trying circumstances.

I was convinced I would not find peace without someone being held accountable for the criminal behaviors, privacy violations, and injustice committed against me. Coming to terms with the possibility that justice would likely never be served left me to question a lot: karma, my faith in the criminal justice system, & even my own self worth. I want to emphasize how lonely a place it can be in the skin of a stalking victim. I had every right to feel anger, disappointment, and frustration. Although I tried my best to be optimistic, if I had a good day I'd still dread the next. However, I’ve conditioned myself to recognize when I’m experiencing such feelings, and I allow myself to feel them, but I cannot dwell. “You can cry today, be pissed off today, but not tomorrow”. Do I allow myself some leanness? Yes, absolutely, but I began making a mental note if I was having a “sad sap” day, it would not translate to the next. It’s much easier to feel sorry for yourself than it is to pick yourself up. Hanging on to negative feelings and resentment does not do a drop of good for me or my mental well being. What's getting me through the hard time grind is productivity. Whether that means focusing on physical fitness, meditation, hobbies, or work, anything beats sitting on the couch feeling sorry for myself.

Lastly, in the thick of my stalking situation, the word "fun" wasn't even in my vocabulary. At long last I've begun to have fun again, even if it's something simple like watching my best friend's kids, I've learned to find fun and joy once more.

I hope that this space can inspire others to find balance and strength, no matter what storms they may face.:)